COMFORT MY MOM
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|| Tuesday, December 27, 2005 ||Pyro enjoyed Christmas.
He spent it with cousins and family.
He even spent it outside.
He even enjoyed seafood at Seaside, and fireworks at the Pyro Olympics.
What's more... he's attending his tita's wedding, sporting an orange barong and his new Chuck Taylor's.
Aside from the wedding, he gave Christmas a whole wonderful meaning.
And he thanks everyone who has been kind to say a prayer for him.
And he kissed Baby Jesus and also offered a prayer for everyone else.
|| Friday, December 16, 2005 ||A ROCK AND A HARD PLACE
... or being caught between the devil and the deep blue sea.
Or a case of damned if you do, damned if you don't.
Talk about crossroads.
Pyro is undergoing his 3rd chemo treatment. And he's registering bad reactions again... he's back to not eating and being thoroughly traumatized.
Dr. Gepte (oncologist) wants the removal of the tumor asap. First, to reduce the cancer stage to Stage 1. Second, to eliminate most of the 'enemies'. Third, because it seems Py's cancer is very agressive, and all the chemo is doing is controlling the growth of the tumor/reducing the tumor size, but not killing the cancer itself. Fourth, the side effects of the treatments are endagering Py's vital organs already, making him weaker for the operation he MUST have, sooner or later.
Dr. Ong (pulmonologist) and Dr. Gonzales (surgeon) wants to make sure first that the tumor has been reduced to an operable size before they cut Pyro open. Both feel the reduced tumor size isn't enough, and the location of the cancer really critical. See, if Py gets opened up and Dr. Gonzales will only find that it will be more damaging to remove the tumor... he'd have to stitch Pyro up again, and this time, the kid will be more uncomfortable.
There's also that damnening fact that Py has to be 'fattened; up before he can continue with more chemo sessions, or before he could be operated on. But fattening him up also translates to getting his tumor fortified.
The doctors are now consulting with each other to give us options and discuss with us the risks... and then they'd be meeting with us.
Where are you going?
Where are we headed?
We're all praying hard these days... for Py, for the people in charge of him.
It's kinda sh!tty too, to have him unable to enjoy the Christmas lights and shows everywhere... how he hasn't been to the mall for 2 months now... how he has been longing to see a fountain!
There'd be a fountain where am getting married.
And there'd be a fountain where am having my reception.
But eventhough the doctors gave their GO SIGNAL to have him attend as HONORARY BEST MAN... I left the decision to my brother and SIL... whatever they think is best for Pyro.
The wedding won't be as happy without him... or them... in the family pictures. But it's ok, if the absence would save his life somehow.
But again there's that thought... what if he doesn't make it? Wouldn't we regret not giving him the chance to camwhore himself to infinity on that day... and strut his stuff in an orange barong as was originally planned?
If you know you could lose a child anytime... do you really draw lines up to where and how you can make him happy?
|| Sunday, December 11, 2005 ||ALL HERE NOW
Those who watched Pyro grow from a teeny infant to a tot.
Friday ended with Pyro looking up to see who was entering our door, saw a really familiar face which he identified as "Mama".
Saturday began with my cousin Tin arriving from GenSan.
Sunday morning, my Mom woke everybody up to wake Pyro up.
Our house is officially jampacked with people. And Py's parents braved the risks and brought Pyro to Church with them... where he kept telling Tita Tin that they go to SM to buy balloon and cake.
His Mom bought balloon and cake. My SIL said, since she missed Pyro's birthday, the cake was justified. I couldn't agree more.
And when my sis teased my SIL if she had a message written on the cake... and what message... my SIL bowed her head, and got red a little from trying not to cry.
She missed a lot. Over the weekend, my SIL had to listen to us cram all the information and stories we can into her... for all the times she wasn't watching her son grow up... like what the heck is PINOY AKO, why was Py referring to himself as KUBA, why Py had nail polish on some of his toes, what food he loves, how much he's grown, what was he like during his chemo treatments...
I can't imagine how painful things are for her... eventhough she's already home.
To top it all, my Mom, who missed her only grandchild so much... sometimes fails to notice that my SIL has been away too. So the Lola is all over Pyro a lot, even asking the child to sleep with them instead.
And because there was cake, and because there were candles, and because there was a divicam... Pyro blew out candles with all his family present, singing and clapping for him, as if it's really his birthday tonight.
We're all here now... Mom and Dad, Jun, Rez and Me, Ninong Jojo, Tita Tin and Tita Gang, and of course, Mommy Angie.
We all love him.
My sis keeps getting amazed at how strangers can feel for Py even without knowing him. Mom arrived ladden with toys from different people she met in the US, who knew about her cancer-stricken grandchild.
Like what my sis keeps saying... International ang concern for my nephew. :)
That's a real great Christmas gift.
|| Wednesday, December 07, 2005 ||HAIRLESS (with pictures)
I'm sorry for not updating this lately.
On one hand, i've been real busy with wedding preps.
On the other hand, Py's 2nd chemo cycle went so beautifully non-traumatic. He was never depressed (unlike the 1st time). He also didn't go home depressed when he had another CT scan done last week.
Results say that the tumor responded to the chemotherapy treatments. By how much, am not sure. We're still awaiting his doctors' decision on how many more chemo treatments will be necessary to shrink his tumor to a more manageable size so they can proceed with surgery.
And Py has been overly makulit, he's been literally driving us crazy... or driving us into small accidents (plate falling on my sister's foot, for example).
He's been devouring cake and cereal... he's been drawing on walls and tables... he's been talking on the phone, making up conversations with people (we suspect) he misses... he's still always asking to go visit a fountain... he still loves going over picture books...
And when Ninong Jojo brings his divicam along... he says, "picture picture tayo Ninong" and hams it up, watching himself sing and dance from the divicam's lcd. Apart from "Happy Birthday", he now sings "Merry Christmas" too, enjoying the Christmas lights and the advanced carollers who have passed by our home.
And now, he refuses to eat cake pala without first having us light a candle on top of it, for him to sing to and then blow out.
Basta, he's so makulit, it's so easy to forget he isn't sick.
Last night, I got home with my eyes brimming with tears. My sis and cousin thought I had a fight with Jojo... actually, I was just depressed.
See, there is going to be a WORLD PYRO OLYMPICS held here in Manila on Dec 26-30. 10 Countries will be competing and the ticket would cost only P100.
Have I said here that my nephew was named so because his mother sang "THROUGH THE FIRE" really well... and that was what
And which kid didn't like Christmas lights and fireworks?
But we cannot bring Pyro there... not only is it risky to expose him to so many people (lest he catches something), the fumes/smoke from the fireworks would be bad for his lungs.
I was really very depressed yesterday about this... am better now.
I just really can't wait till this baby gets better.